I’ve always been fascinated by how difficult it is to see people for what and who they truly are.
When we encounter someone for the first time, our internal mapping system tends to almost instantly form a low-resolution picture of what they may be like. Such an image is often created on the basis of previous experiences or associations with people we met who may look similar to the person we encounter for the first time.
Such a low-resolution image is also often imbued with our worldview. If we believe that people are inherently bad or unethical, the image is tainted a priori accordingly. Conversely, if we see people as inherently flawed yet capable of goodness, then our initial image of them is imbued with this nuance.
Like icons on the desktop of this laptop I am working on, which represent avatars of the apps, folders, or programs they embody, one needs to double-click to decompress and unpack all relevant information and bring a higher-resolution version of the program or app into being.
Similarly, our perception of every single person we encounter is like that very low-resolution desktop icon—a compressed yet limited avatar of the whole.
We need to double-click on them to see what they are truly about. To do so, we should engage in honest, heartfelt conversations, show genuine interest, and truly care.
We must presume that the avatar we see is a poor representation of the wealth of information, wisdom, and life experiences they carry within.
American essayist Ralph Waldo Emerson wrote the following in his letters in the late 1800s:
“Shall I tell you the secret of the true scholar? It is this: Every man I meet is my master in some point, and in that I learn of him.”
But this is not merely about learning; it is about engaging more deeply with others and more meaningfully with life.
It is about having the courage to go more deeply than skin-deep; to pierce through the veil of comfortable ‘desktop’ superficiality and delve into the plane of deep engagement and meaningful exploration—of others and of life.
The world, your colleagues, your employees, your clients, your spouse, your kids—they all wait for you to get to know them, and for them to get to know you beneath the surface.
So, are you ready to double-click your next encounter and see what lies beneath?
Eager to hear your thoughts!
Philippos